You Cannot Download this book untill you login but you can read it .
Login Register
Mustapha is a different case duk abinda nayi masa bani da nadama amma su dai, especially Mommy ya kamata inyi kokarin kyautata mata ko dan kaunar da take nuna min. Amma kyautatawar ba zata yi involving auren Mustapha ba, in na auri Mustapha da shi zan zauna ba da ita ba and I won't subject myself to lifetime of emotional torture saboda in kyautata mata.
Ina kallon ta ta fito ta tayar da sallah nima na tashi na shiga toilet na sake alwala na fito nima na cigaba da sallolina. Sai bayan sallah asuba sannan na hau gado na kwanta bacci mai nauyi ya dauke ni. Cikin baccin naji maganganun Mommy da na Aunty Hajjo suna maganganu, nayi shiru ina son jin me suke cewa sai naji Mommy tace "to har yanzu dai bata fadi waye ba. Ko ta sani ko bata sani ba Allahu a'alam". Aunty Hajjo tace "ikon Allah. Kuma ku bakuyi komai akai ba? Kuka zauna kuka zuba mata ido?" Mommy tace "munyi iyakacin kokarin mu fa, babu abinda bamuyi ba. Munyi running duk options din mu amma ta rufe kowacce hanya da za mubi mu samo wancan yaron da muke zargi" Aunty Hajjo tace "makarantar su fa? Kun bincika ba'a can yaje ba?".
Nayi juyi kamar a lokacin na tashi. Mommy tayi gyaran murya sannan tace "ki tashi Safiyya ki ci abinci ki sha magani. Zan koma asibiti gurin Daddy". Na tashi da dan sauri na sannan nace "Mommy zan biki dan Allah. Zanje in ganshi" ta tabe baki kawai bata ce komai ba, da alama har lokacin fushi take yi dani. Na sauko daga gadon na gaishe da Aunty Hajjo, ta amsa da ɗan sakin fuska kadan ba kamar jiya ba amma kuma babu annurin da nakan gani a tare da ita da.
Da sauri na shiga toilet nayi wanka na fito jikina lullube da hijab, na debi kayana na koma toilet din babu wanda yayi min magana a cikin su, sai dana shirya na saka wani hijab ɗin sannan na sake fitowa na tarar sai Mommy ita kadai a zaune. Ina zama ta bare magunguna ta miko min tana cewa "na lura in dai bani na baki maganin nan ba ba kya sha Safiyya, ke baki damu da kanki ba ballantana ki damu da wanda ya damu da ke". Na fahimci magana take gaya min amma ban ce komai ba sai kawai na karbi magungunan a hannunta na watsa su gabaki daya a baki na hadiye. Ta tsaya tana min kallon mamaki, ta san da in zan sha magani wani lokacin sai ta kira Safina sun hadu sun danne ni sannan zasu dura min, in sun gama durawa kuma in ba sa'a suka yi ba in yi musu amai a jiki.
But now I do not care about anything anymore. Except for Daddy.
Ta ce "kinga yanzu ba zama zan ringa yi a gida tare da ke sosai ba. Ki ringa shan magani ko dan ki samu lafiya da karfin jikin da zaki rabu da abinda yake cikin ki lafiya". Na daga kafada "but I don't need it. Daddy yace I won't labour. Za'a yi aiki a cire". Ta saki baki tana kallona, na lura da bacin rai a fuskarta farko ban fahimci dalilin bacin ranta ba sai daga baya sannan na fahimta, Daddy bai gaya mata decision dinsa ba.
Ta ajiye robar ruwan hannunta tace "yaushe ne kuka yi wannan shawarar ke da shi?" Na sunkuyar da kaina "ba shawarar mukayi ba Mommy. I thought you knew. Nima gaya min kawai yayi. I am sorry. Zan ringa shan maganin".
Ta mike tsaye "ki dauki abinci ki ci ki fito mu tafi. In kuma shima abincin kunyi shawarar ba sai kin ringa ci ba shima sai ki gaya min in daina bata lokaci na akan kokarin baki. Na bar Safina ita kadai a gida, na bar twins a lokacin da suka bukata ta, and I am here a gurin da ba'a bukata ta". Ta juya ta fita da sauri
Nima da saurin na hada tea na sha sannan na bita a baya. Ina fitowa sitting room dinsu naga Abdul ya shigo da sauri, yana gani na yayi murmushi "daddy's girl, ke muke jira" ban bashi amsa ba na bishi a baya muka fita.
A asibiti muna zuwa muka shiga ciki, Mommy tana gaba ina binta a baya tunda ita tasan gurin. Muka je reception sai naji tana tambayar receptionist din da muka samu a gurin ko an shiga da Daddy gurin aikin da za'a yi masa. Na bude ido ina jin zuciya ta tana bugawa da karfi. Naji matar tace a'a ba'a fara ba an dai yi sedating ɗin sa. Ta nuna mana hanyar da zamu je dakin da aka kaishi.
Mommy ta juya zata tafi na tari gabanta da sauri nace "Mommy aiki? Wanne aiki za'a yi masa kuma?" Ta bata rai tace "ba wani major aiki bane ba fa just a minor non surgical operation zasu yi masa suyi clearing airways ɗin sa dan ya samu sauƙin numfashi. I signed the consent yesterday kafin in tafi".
Cikin daga murya nace "and why wasn't I informed?" Sai kuma na rufe bakins da hannayena biyu feeling terrible, na kama hannayen ta "Mommy I am sorry, I am very sorry. I don't know menene ya hau kaina, my emotions are all over the place. Please I am sorry" ta dafa hannuna tace "it is okay. I understand. Go and see him".
Na juya da sauri mai kama da gudu na tafi dakin da aka ce yana ciki. Ina shiga na ganshi a kwance, flat on hus back, duk da cewa naji sunce allurar bacci suka yi masa amma sai da ganin sa a haka ya tayar min da hankali. Na tsaya ina kallon sa, trying so hard not to imagine ranar da zan ganshi a haka babu rai a jikinsa. Sai naga ya mirsa hannunsa ya bude idonsa ya sauke su a kaina. A hankali naga murmushi ya bayyana a fuskarsa, irin murmushin da yake yi da idan ya ganni. Ya miko min hannunsa "Safiyya. You are here? Zo nan" na tafi da sauri na kama hannunsa da duk hannayena biyu ina jin kamar in tsaga kirjina in saka shi a ciki. Yace "I just had a dream. A very bad dream. Wai wani abu ya faru dake, something terrible. I am glad it was just a dream. I am glad you are okay" sai ya mayar da idonsa ya rufe ya koma bacci. Na kankame hannun sa a kirjina ina kuka "I am sorry Daddy. I am really sorry".
Sai da doctors din suka shiga sannan Uncle Sufyan ya fito dani ina ta kuka kamar wani major abu za'a yi masa. Da kyar ya lallashe ni nayi shiru, ina kallon Abdul yana yi min dariya but I didn't find his laughter funny. Sai da nayi shiru sannan Uncle Sufyan yace inzo muje gurin obstetric ɗin da zai ke dubani, I wanted to stay har Daddy ya dawo hayyacin sa amma yace an riga anyi appointment dole inje a ganni.
Section daban ya kaini a asibitin, yayi musu magana sai ya tafi ya barni a gurin su, suka dauki duk vitals ɗina da duk wani gwaje-gwajen da ake bukata na masu ciki suka yi recording sannan suka shigar dani gurin doctor ɗin. Shima dai tambayoyin yayi min sannan ya duba duk results din tests din da akayi min. Sai kuma yace in kwanta zaiyi scanning. Na kwanta na rufe idona, ina jin sa yana goga abin scanning din a ciki na amma ban bude ido ba. Naji yace "a healthy baby. As happy as a puppy" sai kuma yayi dariya, ni kuma ban ga abin dariya a cikin maganar ba. Ya ce "will you like to know the gender?" Nayi sauri na girgiza kai na still idona a rufe. Ya sake cewa "open your eyes and look at it" na sake girgiza kaina. Haka yayi ta tsokana ta yana jana da hira dan in saki jiki amma ni ko a jikina. Sai da ya gama na dawo na zauna sannan ya fara yi min bayanin yanayin lafiyar babyn da kuma abinda zan iya fuskanta nan gaba kafin lokacin cire babyn yayi. Ya kara tambaya ta idan da gaske ina son a cire babyn at 7 months na amsa masa da yes, ni da zasu cire shi at 6 ma so nake yi.
Har sai da ya gama yace zan iya tafiya, na mike tsaye sai kuma na dawo na zauna ina jujjuya hannu na. Ya tsayar da hankalin sa a kaina yace "is there something you want to talk to me about?" Nayi shiru kamar banji shi ba ina cigaba da jujjuya hannuna sannan na dago kai a hankali nace "when the baby is out. I want to give it up for adoption".
Yayi shiru yana kallona fuskarsa da mamaki sannan yace "are you sure? Are you sure this is what you want to do?" Na gyada kaina "I am sure" ya girgiza kansa "I have to talk to your father about this. He didn't mention something like this. I need to....." Nace "I am 21 years old. I am legally old enough to make my own decisions" ya duba file ɗina, maybe to confirm the age, sannan ya sake kallona yace "what about the baby's father. We need to have his approval as well. He needs to.." Nace "there is no father. I don't know who the father is. I was raped" kalmar rape ɗin da na fada ta saka hawaye suka fara bin fuskata, and that caught his attention. Na ga alamun tausayi a fuskarsa, sai kuma yayi dan rubutu a cikin takardu na sannan yace "I am sorry for what happened to you. But I still need you to go home and think deeply about this. If it is still what you want when you come in for your next appointment then we will take the next step. There are papers that you will need to sign. And you have to decide if you want an open adoption or closed adoption. An open adoption is when you leave all your informations so that the baby and it's adoptive parents can keep in touch with you, while a close adoption is when the baby can never be traced to you, you will have no relationship of whatsoever with the baby ......" Direct nace "closed adoption. I want to give up the baby for a closed adoption".
Ya cigaba da girgiza kansa. "Please Safiyya, reconsider. Think about this" nace "I have. I have made up my mind. This is what I want". Ya ce "okay. But this is protocol. You have to go and think about it. When you come back next week, then we will finalize your decision". Na gyada kaina. "okay. Thank you" na mike zan tafi, har sai da na bude kofa sai kuma na rufe ina kallon sa nace "one more thing please. I don't want my father to know. I don't want anyone to know.
To gain access to the book contact
👇
0704 203 0419
Ta manhajar telegram
****. ****. ****. ****. ****. ****
❤🩹*SAFIYYAH*❤🩹
*Episode Five (5): The Path of Destiny*
Ina fita na hango Mustapha yana tsaye a corridor din yana kallon kofar office din da na fito daga ciki, na dauke kaina nayi kamar ban ganshi ba na zo na wuce shi. Ya biyo baya na yana gyaran murya. "excuse me... Akwai mutum fa a tsaye tun dazu yana jiran ki" ban kalle shi ba ban kuma tsaya ba. Ya cigaba da bi na. "Nima bani na kawo kaina ba ballantana ki wulakanta ni. Cewa akayi inzo in jira ki in kin gama in mayar da ke gida, shi yasa na taho ba dan wai ina son hakan ba, kin san ni ina jin maganar Mommy da Daddy in sun gaya min bana tsallake wa". Na tsaya da tafiyar da nake yi na juyo ina kallon sa cikin ido, yayi murmushi, sai kawai na girgiza kaina na juya na cigaba da tafiya a raina nace he is not worth it, so yake in kula shi, in na kula shi kuma na bashi abinda yake so kenan.
Ya cigaba da bi na. "excuse me??? Motar tana can side ɗin ba nan ba. You have two options here dear little sister, you can either come with me in kai ki gida kamar yadda iyayen mu suka ce or you can walk tun daga nan har gida, and in your condition, that will be very impossible". Still bance komai ba nayi hanyar inda side din da na bar Daddy dazu. Ya cigaba "okay. You have another option to get home. Maybe zaki samu wani ya baki lift. It won't be hard for you. I mean you are use to it tunda har tsaraba kika samu saboda shiga motar mutane".
Na juyo a fusace na buga masa handbag ɗina a kansa, a raina naso ace tana da nauyin da zata ji masa ciwo. Ya dafe kan "aww. Me nayi? Daga fadar gaskiya? I guess ita dama gaskiya daci ne da ita" na juya na cigaba da tafiya ganin yadda mutane suka juyo suna kallon mu. Ya cigaba da bi na yana sosa inda na dake shi. "Kar ki damu. Na yafe miki. Ni bana fushi ai kin sani. Ko da zanyi fushi ma ba zan yi fushi da 'wife' ɗina ba. We will put all these behind us. Now, you will follow me muje in kai ki gida kamar yadda Mommy tace and in turn ba zan faɗa wa Daddy inda kika je ranar nan ba, ba zan bashi labarin me Tesla ɗin nan ba. I guess it won't be hard to trace him with that kind of a car, musamman in akayi considering da rashin girman makarantar ku. I bet shi kadai yake da irin motar a cikin makarantar".
Na dakata da tafiyar da nake yi amma ban juyo ba sai da na rufe ido na na ja dogon numfashi da fatan zan hana kaina sauke mari kyakkyawa akan fuskarsa, na juyo da murmushi a tawa fuskar ina kallon sa nace "look Mustapha. Daga maganganun ka na fahimci cewa you are yet to receive the recent memo. Daddy ya fasa aura min kai, because I told him bana son ka. So stop following me around and find a life. And also stop threatening me because it is not going to work".
Daga yadda yayi da fuskarsa na fahimci cewa Mommy bata gaya masa ba. Maybe tana fatan zata yi convincing dina na amince da auren so she thought he doesn't have to know. Yace "you are lying. You have always been a little liar" na daga kafada "of cause I am a liar, na sha yiwa mutane da yawa karya, people that matters a lot to me. But I won't waste my time lying to you because you are not worth it. In baka yarda ba ka tambayi Mommy" na juya zan tafi sai dai kuma har nayi taku biyu sai na tsaya na kuma juyowa ina kallon sa nace "and about cikin jikina. Ni na yarda akwai kiyama, na san kuma ni da kai zamu je can. A can ne kuma zamu karasa maganar".
Sai da na yi nisa sannan na fahimci baya bina, kuma sai a lokacin na fahimci nayi batan kai na bi hanyar da ba ita ya kamata in bi ba. Sai da nayi tambaya sannan na gane inda na baro Daddy. Ina zuwana tarar da Mommy a zaune a waje. Na karasa gurinta ina haki saboda tafiyar da nayi kuma da sauri. Ta mike tana goge min gumin goshina da hanky din hannunta. "Ya naganki a kafa? Ina Mustaphan da na tura ya dauko ki ya mayar da ke gida ki huta?" Nace "ban san inda yake ba. Ba gida zan je ba. Ya Daddyn? Sun gama?" Ta koma ta zauna tace "eh sun gama. Na gaya miki fa ba wani abu bane za'a yi masa mai wahala ba. Bacci dai yake yi yanzu". Na wuce ta na shiga dakin, na ganshi yana ta bacci kuma ko daga yanayin yadda yake numfashi na fahimci aikin da aka yi masa ya saukaka masa numfashin sosai. Na zauna a kujerar kusa da gadon na kama hannunsa tare da sauke ajjiyar zuciya nace "I love you so much Daddy. And everything is going to be alright" amma ni kaina da na fada sai naji ban yarda da abinda nace ba, saboda a kasan zuciya ta ina jin cewa, this is only the beginning, saboda zuwa yanzu na fahimci cewa "tragedy" is another name for my family.
Har dare ina tare da Daddy, duk kuwa da yadda Mommy take ta min maganar tafiya gida amma ban tafi ba na farko saboda bana son tafiya da Mustapha, na biyu saboda ina son spending time a kusa da Daddy duk kuwa da cewa ba kula ni yake yi ba. Sai da daren sannan Daddy da kansa yace ni da Mommy mu bi Uncle Sufyan mu tafi gida, sai a lokacin na sake ganin Mustapha dan tun sa da muka rabu dashi bai dawo ba Mommy ma ina jinta tana ta cigiyar sa. Naga sun tsaya sunyi maganganun su da Mommy sannan ta taho muka shiga mota muka tafi, tunda muka shiga motar kuma bata ce komai ba har muka je gida, da muka je ma bata yi min magana ba sai suka kama hirar su da Aunty Hajjo ni kuma nayi musu sallama na shiga daki.
A dakin nayi sallah nayi shirin kwanciya bacci. Kamar kullum ina kwanciya dukkan damuwoyin da nake dasu suka saukar min, amma a daren yau abinda yafi tsaya min arai shine Muhammad. Maganar sa dazu da Mustapha yayi ta taba min bangaren da nake ta kokarin binnewa a cikin zuciyata a kwana biyun nan. Bana son in bude fejin tunaninsa dan bana jin zuciyata zata iya daukan halin da na san yana ciki a yanzu. Na cutar da shi iyakacin cutarwa. Amma kuma bana jin ko da a raina cewa abinda nayi ɗin ba dai dai bane ba. In na gaya masa gaskiya he will stick with me through thick and thin. And I am a walking and breathing tragic bomb waiting to explode. Bana son stains ɗina ya bata white ɗin sa. So nake ya tsane ni tsanar da zata saka ya manta da ni kar ya cigaba da bibiyata. So nake ya samu wadda ta dace dashi yayi aurensa ya gina kyakkyawar rayuwar sa da iyalinsa. Irin kyakkyawar rayuwar da muka fara tsarawa zamuyi ni da shi.
Na fara kokarin picturing dinsa ya yanzu, ko me yake yi? Ko yayi bacci? Na duba agogo naga karfe tara, meaning karfe takwas kenan a Nigeria. Na san bai yi bacci ba yanzu. Ten mostly yake yin bacci. A wannan lokacin mostly mukan kasance muna yin waya ne. Na fara kokarin picturing dinsa a dakin sa. Bana jin akwai wani bangare a dakin sa wanda ban sani ba saboda yawan FaceTime da muke yi idan yana dakin. Na tina da wata hira da muka taba yi a cikin irin hirarrakin mu na planning rayuwar mu.
****. ****. ****. ****. ****. ***
"And you will look so handsome in white"
Ya bata fuska "and who told you white zan saka?" Nace "angwaye ai white suke saka wa ranar daurin aure, and I will wear white lace with golden veil and we will snap pictures, irin Mr and Mrs din nan" yayi dariya "ohh Piya, so you think I am like most people da zanyi abinda most people suke yi? I am special. I will wear something special" nace "okay to menene special ɗin, wacce color zaka saka? Pink or yellow?" Ya kyalkyale da dariya, sai kuma ya juya bayansa yana kallon kofa "kinga kin saka ni ina ta dariya a daki ni kadai, kar mutanen gidan nan suce nuts din kaina sun kwance" nace "to ka bani amsa mana. Kasan kuwa har na hango ka ka saka yellow shadda ranar daurin aure?" Ya kuma yin dariya, fuskarsa cike da nishadi dan lokacin bashi da wata matsala a duniya.
Nace "am serious fa farar shadda zaka saka" yace "to wai saboda me zan saka fara?" Na turo baki na kwabe fuska kamar zanyi kuka har da bubbuga hannuna akan katifar da nake zaune "ni dai Allah sai ka saka fara, Allah in baka saka ba ranar kuka zanyi tayi" yace "okay okay shagwababbiyar Daddy. Naji zan saka fara, amma ba shadda ba, sai dai yadi" na danyi tunani sai kuma na gyada kai cikin nuna amincewa "okay. Allah ya taimake ka. Ranar da ka sha rigima" yace "in dai rigimar ki ce ai na saba da ita, in an tashi kawo kayan lefenki har da zanin goyo za'a saka. Dan naga alamar in kika fara wata rigimar sai na goya ki sannan zaki yi shiru".
Na rufe fuska ta ina dariya, yace "am serious fa. That's something I can do. I just can't wait for the time".
****. ****. ****. ****. ****. ****.
A cikin tunanin bacci ya dauke ni. A cikin baccin ne kuma nayi mafarki da shi. Sai dai a cikin mafarkin ba dariya yake kyalkyalawa ba, in fact fuskarsa a murtuke take da irin kallon da yayi min ranar da muka rabu dashi. Ina tsaye a kofar office dinsa hannayena biyu rike da cikina.
"I hate you" ya fada min cikin dacin murya.
"I hate you more than I have ever loved you"
"You are the worst creature that have ever walked the surface of this earth"
Sai kuma ya dauko bindiga daga cikin aljihunsa ya harbe ni da ita a kirji dai dai saitin zuciya ta. Na saki cikin da sauri na dafe kirjin. Ina cewa "I am sorry Muhammad. I am very sorry"
Ji nayi an rike kafaduna duk biyun ana girgiza ni da karfi. "Safiyya? Ke Safiyya" da muryar Mommy. Na bude ido na a firgice saura kadan in fadi daga kan gado, sai a lokacin na fahimci, mafarki nake yi, daga alama kuma maganganun da nake yi a mafarkin sun fito fili. Nayi kokarin daidaita numfashina tare da karanto addu'a, sannan na dafe kaina da hannu daya, har a lokacin ina jin amsa kuwwar muryar Muhammad. "I hate you"
Mommy tace "wanne irin mafarki kike ne haka Safiyya? Waye kuma Muhammad?" Nayi sauri na kalle ta idanuna a bude. "uhmm Muhamm... Waye Muhammad?" Na mayar mata da tambayar, tace "to ni kya tambaye ni? Ke kike ambatar Muhammad cikin baccin ki kina bashi hakuri" na girgiza kaina "ni ban san wani Muhammad ba. Mafarki ne kawai. Ni ba zan iya tuna mafarkin ma da nayi ba" sai nayi sauri na koma na kwanta tare da jan bargo na lullube har fuska ta tare da rufe idona da karfi ina sauraron yadda zuciya ta take bugawa da karfi, bakina yana furta "innalillahi wa inna ilaihir rajiun" ni na san a yanzu idan Mommy da Mustapha zasu hada informations din da suke da su a guri daya, to tabbas zasu iya tracing Gidado. And I can't imagine anyi knocking gidan su gidado an gayawa iyayensa cewa yayi wa dalibar sa ciki.
Wannan mugun tunanin shi ya yanke min dukkan baccin wannan daren
****. ****. ****. ****. ****. ****
*Him 👳🏻*
Kwanaki biyun nan suna daga cikin worse days of Gidado's life. Gabakidaya kwanaki biyun a daki yayi su, highest da ya fito shine parlor ya gaishe da Abba ya juya ya koma. In an tambaye shi me yake damunsa sai yace bashi da lafiya. Babu abinda bai ce yana damunsa ba. Yace kansa ne yake ciwo yace cikinsa, da daddare kuma da Mama ta shiga har daki ta matsa masa da tambaya sai yace kwakwalwar sa ce take ciwo.
It should be funny but it didn't sound funny to Mama, dan sosai hankalin ta yake a tashe akan halin da gudan ranta yake ciki. It also